Korean War Veteran
Around 2006, my wife and I starting taking care of my father and mother. My Dad’s health began to fade and he had to stop driving. We took over buying groceries, paying their bills, cooking for them to make sure my parents had 3 meals a day. My mother was blind but got around pretty well. She could even fix her own coffee! During that time, Oct 2008, I woke up one morning, around 3:00 AM, not being able to breathe. My wife called 911 and I was taken to the hospital. In the ER, they determined I had heart failure. I was admitted and when I was stable, the doctor did a catheterization. They found many blockages in my heart- not much they could do at the time. I was in the hospital for over a month. Finally, I was sent home with lots of medication and was told if this didn’t work, the next step would be a heart transplant. The doctors said that it was stress that brought this on. During my stay at the hospital, I found out I was diabetic also. I have glaucoma too. The sight in my left eye is nearly gone, it’s just fair in my right eye. My wife has to drive everywhere because I am not able to.
During the time I was in the hospital, my wife still took care of my Daddy and Mom, trying to work and getting the 2 kids to school. The bills just didn’t stop! When I got out of the hospital, the doctors told me that I wouldn’t be able to work again. When I started feeling better, I tried to help do what I could to help my wife take care of my parents. We were struggling and on the edge of losing our home but God helped us work it out. With me not working and not getting the money we were used to was a big adjustment. We had it really tough. I used my retirement to help keep up the bills and pay for the house then we got the mortgage refinanced. Then I received my disability but my medications still had to be paid for out of pocket. It took 3 years to get Medicare for me but that did not pay for the back hospital debt.
While all this was going on, my parents still needed our help. In 2012, my mother fell and couldn’t get up. She was in bed for a while. Later on, she tried to get up and fell again. A nurse came to the house to check her out. She was bruised a little bit but ended up bed ridden and she couldn’t walk at all. My wife took care of all her needs and I took care of my Daddy. My mom got pneumonia and we had to get her to the hospital. They kept her for a few days and then she was sent to a nursing home. She got really dehydrated. They took her back to the hospital and found out she had punctured her lung. Two days later, she died on her birthday. She would have been 87.
We went to the bank and was able to borrow money to pay for her funeral. We finished paying off the loan last year for mom’s funeral and started putting money away for my Daddy’s funeral someday. My wife used to clean houses but had to stop because of her bad health. That took away from putting money into my Daddy’s funeral fund.
My Daddy had dementia and alzheimers so we had to put him in a nursing home in 2012. My Daddy never knew my mother died, he thought she was in rehab. His doctor said it would be better for him not to know about her-up to this year, he never knew. I am sure it would have done more damage to him than good. For the last months of his life, he really did not know me or my family at times. A few months ago, he saw my first grandbaby girl, his first great grandchild. You could see his eyes watering with happiness! I was so glad he got to see her.
On July 10th, the nursing home called me saying that my Dad could not eat or drink. When I got to the nursing home, he wasn’t in good shape at all. I had him taken to the hospital on the spot! We were at the hospital with him in the emergency room. I was in the room with my Dad and he actually knew who I was! I told him to squeeze my hand and he did- and we had our time. The doctor said they were going to put him in a room, he lasted until that evening.
My Daddy was in the Army. He served in Korea and left with a Honorable Discharge. He worked for a company after that for 46 years. He was supposed to have life insurance for him and my mother until their deaths. The company sold out to a corporate company which would not honor his promo from the other company. It was not in paper so nothing could be done.
We have tried to stand by my parents throughout the years and do all we could possibly do, now I have a debt I cannot pay. My health isn’t getting any better with this stress, for I feel it everyday! God has helped me through all the past years, I know he will now too.
Thank you from my Family.
The Fans of America Foundation helped with some of the costs for his father’s funeral expenses. God Bless…